Dear Younger self.

You were born and raised a shy Māori/Cook Island girl from a small town, Tokoroa. That was your heart, your purpose, your home, everything you'd ever known for 13 years. A big family with so many dynamics, statistics, characteristics, and struggling with a stereotype that was projected onto people like you. You moved from one home to another, one school to another. You lived surrounded by the influence of substances, and wishing you never had to grow up like that. You have been through so much yet you stayed strong through it all. You picked yourself each time and carried on even when you had no support. You chose to walk through the tough times, allowing yourself to learn from those experiences. 

You’re 23 years old now, and life is so different to what you would have imagined growing up. Ten years worth of trials, decision making, gains, losses, but the key one of them all - experiences. Without all these experiences you wouldn’t know your purpose.

I am the person I am today because of you. You put yourself in uncomfortable places, you navigated unexpected situations, you went through all the experiences, to the point where you had to grow up fast and learn. I am thankful you trusted that these were part of your purpose. I can see now your struggles have been rewarded with a greater ability to push forward and to broaden your horizons. Because of that, I am who I am today. A woman of resilience and purpose. Keep going, you got this! 

Yours sincerely, 

Older self

-       Jayken, 23 years